8 Powerful Ways to Stop Feeling Bad About Yourself and Reclaim Your Confidence"
Feeling bad about yourself is an experience nearly everyone has gone through at some point. It’s that sinking feeling that creeps in during tough times, when negative thoughts overwhelm you, and you begin to question your worth. It can happen after a failure, a mistake, or even after comparing yourself to others. In those moments, it can feel like there's no way out, but it’s important to know that it is possible to shift your mindset and stop feeling bad about yourself.
In this blog post, we'll explore what to do when you feel bad about yourself, share strategies on how to not feel bad about yourself, and guide you toward a healthier, more compassionate relationship with yourself.
1. Acknowledge and Accept Your Feelings
The first step in moving past the feeling of being "bad" is to acknowledge and accept how you’re feeling. Many of us try to avoid or suppress negative emotions, but this only prolongs the discomfort. When you feel bad about yourself, allow yourself to feel what you’re feeling without judgment.
What to do when you feel bad about yourself: Take a moment to pause and recognize your emotions. Are you feeling ashamed, guilty, frustrated, or disappointed? Name the emotion. This practice helps you detach from the emotional spiral and reminds you that emotions are temporary experiences, not permanent states.
Acceptance doesn’t mean you have to like or embrace the feelings, but by giving them space, you can begin to process them rather than fight them. Remember, it’s okay to not feel okay sometimes. Emotions are part of the human experience.
2. Challenge Your Inner Critic
A common reason people feel bad about themselves is the inner critic—the negative voice inside that judges, criticizes, and demeans. This voice often stems from childhood, past experiences, or societal expectations. It can tell you that you aren’t good enough, that you’re a failure, or that you’ll never measure up.
How to not feel bad about yourself: Start by recognizing when your inner critic is speaking. Ask yourself if the thoughts you're having are truly accurate or if they are exaggerated, unhelpful, or unrealistic. Often, our critical self-talk is based on fear or insecurity, not on facts.
Challenge these thoughts by countering them with positive, evidence-based affirmations. For instance, if your inner critic says, “You’re a failure,” respond with, “I have faced challenges before and overcome them. This setback doesn’t define my worth.” By actively disputing negative self-talk, you can silence the inner critic and stop feeling bad about yourself.
3. Reframe Your Thoughts
Sometimes, we feel bad about ourselves because we’ve focused too much on our shortcomings or mistakes. Reframing is the practice of changing the way we look at a situation, which can significantly impact how we feel.
What to do when you feel bad about yourself: Instead of viewing a mistake or failure as evidence that you’re bad or inadequate, try reframing it as an opportunity for growth. Ask yourself, "What can I learn from this experience?" or "How can I use this as a stepping stone to improve?"
For example, if you didn’t get a job you applied for, instead of thinking, “I’m not good enough,” reframe it as, “This is a chance to refine my skills and keep moving toward the right opportunity for me.” Reframing your thoughts helps shift your perspective and reduces the intensity of negative feelings.
4. Practice Self-Compassion
When you're feeling bad about yourself, it’s easy to be hard on yourself. But practicing self-compassion is essential for maintaining a positive self-relationship. Self-compassion involves treating yourself with the same kindness, care, and understanding that you would offer a good friend.
How to not feel bad about yourself: Whenever you catch yourself being self-critical, stop and imagine how you would respond if a loved one were in your shoes. Would you tell them they’re worthless? Likely not. Instead, you would offer support, encouragement, and understanding.
Try saying to yourself, “I’m going through a tough time, and that’s okay. I’m allowed to make mistakes, and I’m worthy of love and kindness.” Self-compassion fosters emotional resilience and reminds you that you are human—flaws and all.
5. Focus on What You Can Control
One of the biggest contributors to feeling bad about yourself is focusing on things outside of your control. You may dwell on things that have happened in the past or worry about things that might happen in the future. This can lead to feelings of helplessness, frustration, and low self-esteem.
What to do when you feel bad about yourself: Redirect your energy to what you can control right now. Take small, practical actions that align with your values and goals. Whether it’s making progress toward a personal project, practicing self-care, or engaging in a hobby, focusing on what you can control empowers you to regain a sense of agency and self-worth.
Even if things are difficult in the present moment, remember that you have the power to take small steps to improve your situation. Each positive action, no matter how small, can boost your confidence and help you feel better about yourself.
6. Shift Your Focus to Gratitude
When you’re feeling bad about yourself, it's easy to fixate on everything that’s going wrong or what you perceive as your failures. Gratitude is a powerful tool to shift your perspective and remind you of the positive aspects of your life.
How to not feel bad about yourself: Start a gratitude practice. Each day, write down three things you’re thankful for—no matter how small they may seem. This could be anything from a warm cup of coffee in the morning to a kind word from a friend. Shifting your attention to what’s going right in your life helps you focus on the good, even when things feel tough.
Research has shown that practicing gratitude can improve mental well-being and reduce feelings of sadness, anxiety, and low self-worth. It fosters a mindset of abundance rather than scarcity, helping you feel more connected to the positive aspects of yourself and your life.
7. Surround Yourself with Positive Influences
The people around you can have a big impact on how you feel about yourself. If you're constantly surrounded by negative influences, people who criticize or bring you down, it can be hard to break free from those feelings of inadequacy.
What to do when you feel bad about yourself: Take a step back and evaluate your relationships. Are there people who consistently make you feel bad about yourself? While it's not always easy, consider setting boundaries with individuals who don't treat you with respect or kindness.
Instead, try to surround yourself with positive influences—people who lift you up, support your growth, and remind you of your worth. Whether it’s family, friends, or online communities, having supportive people around you can help you stay grounded and focused on your strengths.
8. Take Care of Your Physical and Mental Health
Your physical and mental health are deeply connected to your emotional well-being. When you’re feeling bad about yourself, taking care of your body and mind can help improve your mood and energy levels, making it easier to work through negative thoughts and emotions.
How to not feel bad about yourself: Focus on self-care practices that nourish your body and mind. This could include exercise, eating nutritious foods, getting enough sleep, or practicing relaxation techniques like meditation or deep breathing exercises. Physical activity, in particular, is known to boost mood by releasing endorphins, the body’s natural "feel-good" chemicals.
By prioritizing your health, you’re sending a powerful message to yourself that you deserve care, love, and attention. This, in turn, can help you feel better about yourself.
Final Thoughts: You Are Enough
Feeling bad about yourself can be difficult, but it doesn’t have to define who you are. By practicing self-compassion, challenging negative thoughts, focusing on what you can control, and seeking support when needed, you can gradually shift your mindset and feel better about yourself.
Remember, how to not feel bad about yourself starts with understanding that you are not alone in your struggles. Everyone has moments of self-doubt or frustration, but that doesn’t mean you are unworthy. You are enough just as you are, and with time and effort, you can start to believe it.
Take it one step at a time, and be kind to yourself throughout the process. You have the ability to heal, grow, and create a more positive, fulfilling life.